From analise@verinet.com Tue Dec 24 23:18:52 1996 Date: Thu, 31 Oct 1996 08:37:32 +0000 From: Analise Hairabedian To: b5-creative@lists.best.com Subject: Childish Thoughts--part 1 (NEW STORY) Ok..new story...sorry no Convergence here : ) Standard disclaimers....these characters belong to WB and JMS, I certainly would never dream of trying to make $ off them..this is just for fun. ______________________ Childish Thoughts by Analise H. How long? Minutes, moments, seconds, days, weeks, a fortnight, a decade, a millennium? It was so hard to determine. Drifting without form or meaning, lost in a vacuum. It knew nothing of names or titles..it had no purpose to guide it, no gender to bind it and therefore no way of imposing a structure on its existence. Still, it did know one thing...that it had *once* had all of those things..that it had had form, purpose, clarity of thought..all these things in abundance. And somehow, the slowly turning rust-colored planet below meant something to it..gave it a touch of ..something....perhaps the past. So it stayed. Sharing orbit with a strange metal creature that gave no company but the sound of its myriad thoughts..a great cacophonous roar of sound in the void. And it waited. For what, it couldn't say..or even guess. But it knew that if it waited long enough, perhaps it would remember what it was...and why that desolate planet might have meant something to it...and if it might once again. ************************* He sat on the couch, squirming with barely suppressed excitement while his mother attempted to straighten his flight gear. There was nothing that needed straightening, of course, but he could feel her nervousness..and so he let her fiddle with the straps and adjust the fit. His green eyes continued to flick towards the door to the other room where he knew his father was. "David...sit still." his mother admonished, as he fidgeted himself out of her grasp for the third time. "Sorry Mama.." he said, returning his attention to her. She smiled at him and reached up to brush a stubborn lock of sandy hair out of his eyes...automatically tucking it behind his small bonecrest. "It alright.." she said, and he could tell it was more to reassure herself than him. "Your father will be ready any moment now...are you certain you want to do this?" He could hear the unspoken echo of her words in her head..#Am *I* sure I want him to do this?#. He grinned at her. "More than anything!" he exclaimed. "Do you think Papa will let me fly her at all?" The jolt of fear he felt from her then made him jump a bit...and he kept the grin pasted on his face so as not to give away the fact that he could sense such things from her. She was too nervous to notice his reaction, however. He was impressed by her calm facade of control, and he wondered briefly, if Papa had any idea how much she kept hidden under that shell of confidence. He suspected that his father *did* know...that he had his own ways of knowing these things, even without the telepathy that David had struggled to hide from them for the past year. "We'll see about that..." his fathers voice came from the doorway. David leapt to his feet, away from his mothers hands...reaching out to grab the small flight helmet that was next to him on the couch. Delenn got to her feet as well, albeit a little less enthusiastically. He could hear the thoughts in her head as clear as words..she was debating whether to put a stop to this now..he is so young, she was thinking...to young to go out in a Star Fury...even if John *is* with him. He's only 9 years old....maybe I should say something....no...no..John is right. He will be fine.. David was anxious to get his father out of there before his mother lost the internal debate to the naysayer of the two inner voices. He grabbed his fathers hand and hauled him towards the door. "Ok...bye Mama, see you in a little while...come on Papa, lets go...lets go" he said. He'd almost made it to the door when his father stopped, jerking him to a halt. David gave an inward sigh. Come ON..he thought internally...wishing, not for the first time, that his ability to *hear* thoughts extended to the ability to *project* them. He turned to his father and gave the nine-year old equivalent of impatient irritation, folding his arms and glaring...imitating Commander Ivanova. His father was looking at his mother, and he could hear their thoughts clearly as if they were speaking to each other out loud. His mother was worried and determined not to show it, and his father was anxious to reassure her. He rolled his eyes..they were going to get all mushy in a moment here. "I'll wait by the lift, Papa" he said, and beat a retreat before his mother could stop him. She looked like she wanted to ..but she let him go. As the door swished shut behind him, he could *feel* them coming together...her fear...his reassurance..then they blended into one, and David was thankful he'd gotten out in time. He went and punched the lift-call, out of range of their thoughts now. He'd been able to *hear* thoughts for a long time...long as he could remember, but before anyone had found out about that little fact..he'd discovered that those who had his ability were singled out as different...taken away to be trained...their life-courses set. He wanted to be a pilot like his dad..not like the Minbari telepaths he'd seen...living only for the whims of others. Or like the others he knew....the humans who were haunted by their past association with Psi-Corps. He figured it was better to just keep it hidden..pretend that he was a regular kid. Besides, he didn't think he could survive his mother and father's wrath when they found out that he had been *listening* to them all these years. He was certain that he was different from other telepaths...for he got the impression that once you came into your abilities..other telepaths could detect you. But he was able to build a *wall*..a wall that he could hide his talent behind. So far no one had caught on. If he was lucky..he could keep it a secret forever. The sound of a footstep made him turn his head just as the lift doors opened. His father was striding down the hall, tall and handsome in his flight suit..helmet tucked under one arm. He grinned. One day he would look like that...well...except he would have a bonecrest. His hand reached up almost involuntarily to touch the bony growth. He had at first cursed the thing that had made him different from the other human children on the station..but they had learned quickly that he could defend himself readily from teasing..and soon he had gained a grudging respect from the other station boys. A grudging that had grown to admiration after a while. He knew it was because his Minbari blood gave him an advantage in strength...and the fact that he had been in a Minbari school for two years when he was little didn't hurt either. They started teaching martial arts early there. It had instilled a confidence in the little boy that had given him the strength of will to stand up to the much bigger boys in his classes once he'd gotten back to B5. Father and son stepped into the lift and headed down. David was nearly jumping with excitement. His father had told him on his birthday a week ago that he would take him out in a Star Fury for his present, and David had nearly gone through the roof. There was nothing he dreamed of more. Flying. His room was filled with models of every kind of fighter...Earth and Alien, that he could get his hands on. He really wanted to fly a Minbari Fighter...for they were some of the fastest, most maneuverable ships out there...but he knew there was no way he would get a chance to do that until he was much older. He looked up at his father, who looked back down at him with a smile..his hand coming to ruffle Davids sandy hair. He could hear his father thinking: my face, my hair...her eyes, her crest...' David grinned up at him. "Thanks for letting me do this Papa..will I get to fly her?" he asked again. John smiled. "We'll see. Maybe I'll let you, as long as you don't tell your Mom. She's having a hard enough time with this already." The lift doors opened. "I won't.. I promise" he exclaimed, reaching up to cross his heart. They stepped out into the hall and headed into the Arrival Lounge. The place was crawling with Aliens of every shape and size and race. For once, David didn't even notice. His eyes were glued to the corridor that led to the fighter bays. They were going to take out the atmosphere-capable version of the Star Fury..the only earth-force fighter craft able to seat two. Two security men came to attention as they walked by into the hallway, and David spotted Uncle Mike at the end of the hall, speaking with two more men in EarthForce uniforms. He grinned and ran down the hall. "Uncle Mike!" he shouted, waving his helmet in the air. The big Chief of Security glanced towards him and his face split into a grin. He dismissed the men he was talking to and crouched down to catch the catapulting little boy and swung him up. "Well I'll be damned! You look like a regular fighter pilot! Helmet and everything.." He set him down with a show of exhaustion. "Phew, you're getting too big for that..pretty soon you'll be running this place..kick the old man out of here.." he gestured to his father who had just caught up with them. The Captain grinned at his friend. "So you're filling his head with ideas, eh? I always knew you couldn't be trusted.." he said. David smiled. He liked being around his Papa and Uncle Mike almost as much as when his parent were together. The warmth of affection in their thoughts was comforting..like a toasty bathrobe. "The Fury checked out?" his father was asking. "Yup. Everything looks good. Its all ready for you. Where you going to take your old man, kiddo?" Garibaldi asked, looking down at David fondly. The boy smiled up at him. "Epsilon III..I think.." he said, glancing up at his father for confirmation. Sheridan nodded with an indulgent smile. "You`re gonna fly circles around most of the guys here, Kid." David grinned and grabbed his fathers arm. If he ever got the chance he would! But not at this rate.... "Come on, Papa.." he said, grabbing his fathers sleeve and tugging at it impatiently. "Bye, Uncle Mike.." He missed the grin Sheridan threw his Chief of Security as he was pulled into the fighter bay. And there it was. He stopped momentarily. He was going to fly in it...not just look at it as he had so many times before. Sitting quietly in a corner and watching the pilots lovingly care for their fighters, going out, coming in, the technicians swarming over them....the old scarred ships..the new shiny top-of-the-line models. He loved it all.*This* time he was going to actually go out in one. For a moment he couldn't move, and his Father bumped into him. He knew that his Papa knew what he was feeling...that he didn't need to ask what was wrong, and that moment of sameness...of having that in common with this man who was his idol, was as near close to a perfect moment as he could think of. He *knew* his father felt the same exact way...he *knew*. And then they were walking towards the ship...and he was climbing into the secondary cockpit without assistance, because his father knew better than to belittle him by lifting him inside... and he was strapped in by the technicians...surrounded by the consoles and controls of his fathers Fury....and he knew that this was his place in the Universe. The canopy was lowered, and he checked his straps like he'd seen the pilots do a million times..giving the thumbs up to the techs...checking his in-cockpit communication with his father.... and they were lowered into the launch bay. He felt calm. He felt like he was truly at home. And then there was a loud explosion of sound and they were falling into space with a sense of vertigo as the stars seemed to be first at his feet...and then they spun and righted themselves as his brain made the adjustment to the three axis of space. There was no "up"..no "down". He was inside a great emptiness filled with the Universe and it was all around him in every direction. His father's voice broke him out of his reverie. "You ok back there, David?" "Fine.." he said, when he could find his voice again. He looked around him then, at the displays...checking the things that he knew should be checked, even though he knew that his father was controlling the ship. "Can we go into hyperspace?" he asked, his voice sounding hollow on the inter-ship speaker as it re-echoed in his helmet. "Maybe in a bit. First lets get the hang of real space before we do the tricky stuff." The Fury hurtled through space towards the charred husk of Epsilon III. David knew that once, the planet had been "alive". That it had been a giant machine with a living creature as its guiding force. But that was before he was born. It had been destroyed in the Shadow War, and now it was simply a dead planet..streaked with giant swaths of blackened destruction that spread like gangrene from the rifts that lined the surface. It still contained an atmosphere, but that was the only thing that made it more than a simple chunk of rock floating in space. David stared down at the surface. He had never been this close before. They flashed around the planet, through the line that divided light from dark..and they plunged into the night of Epsilon III. It was so quiet. He couldn't hear the voices..the constant buzz of voices that were always present in his mind on the Station. All he heard were his own and his fathers...and at the moment they were so similar as to be nearly indistinguishable. They both belonged out here in space...alone in the darkness of a dead planet's shadow...or alone in the raging otherworld fury of hyperspace....alone but surrounded by your ship. They lowered the atmosphere-wings and swooped down closer to the planet. His father was talking to him, telling him what he was doing...and a part of him was listening avidly..soaking in all that his father was saying. But the other part was lost in the beauty of the scarred landscape below..the dark purples and blues that the lack of sunlight turned the surface. Craters and canyons..lifeless, but beautiful. He had thought that nothing was as beautiful as Minbar was...the temple where he had spent two years of his life, surrounded by 1,000 foot waterfalls and crystal cliffs. But this dead planet, with its desolate landscape, was just as amazing in its own way. "I'm picking up some unusual readings on my scanner.." his fathers voice was saying, sounding a little curious, but not alarmed. "I've never seen anything like it..." David was looking at his own readouts, about to ask his father how to bring up what he was seeing on his own screens....when suddenly he felt..something. And then it hit him like a sledgehammer. His mind was suddenly engulfed in a shifting multitude of images with no borders...a mass of thoughts with no direction, knowledge with no meaning. His mouth opened in a soundless scream as his head was suddenly and completely overwhelmed by the...thing. It was grasping at him with invisible tendrils, curling into each corner and crevice of his mind.. clinging to his very thoughts. So strong...David vaguely knew that he had to either expel the invader or hide... his identity was at stake. Whatever it was..it wanted the coherence that David's mind seemed to offer. He was not strong enough to force it out...it was too big..too desperate.So he hid. Sheridan peered thoughtfully at the screens. Whatever it was..it seemed harmless...a bit of leftover emissions from Epsilon no doubt. Certainly the Great Machine had done strange enough things in the past. And then...it was gone. He frowned a bit, and shrugged to himself. Something, some sound...made him twist a bit in his seat to look at his son...and he felt his heart go cold. David was sitting strapped into his seat..his green eyes staring sightlessly ahead of him..his mouth open slightly. He didn't move. "David?" John asked, feeling his heart rate accelerate a bit. He could hear the fear in his voice echoing in the helmet's speaker. His son made no response..not even a blink. "DAVID?" he asked more loudly. Still nothing. John resisted the urge to unstrap himself and try and twist his way back into the secondary compartment. A rational voice in his mind told him that would be useless...he would never fit. Instead he sent the Fury into a tight spinning arc, hit the thrusters and rocketed back to the station as quickly as he could make the ship go. It seemed an eternity before they were back in the shadow of B5, John trying to tell himself that it would be fine..what could have possibly happened out in dead space? The boy had been fine only a moment before--- his thoughts jumbled to a halt. Just before that odd reading...was that what it was? But if the strange emissions had been harmful, why was he not affected? He barely noticed the customary jolt as the automatic docking systems pulled his fury into the loading Bay, his brain whirling with concern and bemusement. Sheridan pushed impatiently at the slowly lifting canopy, and clambered frantically back to the seat his son was strapped into. He noticed the med team that he had requested was running across the Bay floor towards them out of the corner of his eye as he lifted David out of the cockpit. Once on the floor, he yanked the helmet off the child's head and tossed it carelessly to one side. His son's face was smooth and blank, green eyes staring at nothing. David didn't move or speak...his body was neither limp nor rigid. If it weren't for the fact that he seemed to be catatonic..there seemed to be nothing else wrong with him. He slid to the floor with his son clasped tightly in his arms, whispering Davids name over and over.He stroked the sandy hair back from the damp little forehead, praying for some kind of response. The head of the medteam was trying to pry the child out of the Captain's arms, and he finally relented..letting the medics lay David onto a gurney. "What the hell is wrong with him?" Sheridan's voice cracked. In all of the boy's nine years, he had never had anything worse than a broken elbow. The medic looked up at him distractedly. "I don't know Captain..he seems to be fine physically....we'll have to run some tests on his brain activity.." He said the last as they began to roll the gurney out of the Bay. John followed helplessly..his mind spinning. What the hell had happened? ___________________________________________________________________ Dear Earthforce, Hate you, hate the Alliance, taking B4..... --The One From analise@verinet.com Tue Dec 24 23:20:49 1996 Date: Thu, 31 Oct 1996 09:21:08 +0000 From: Analise Hairabedian To: b5-creative@lists.best.com Subject: Childish Thoughts---part 2 (NEW STORY) Heres part 2....usual disclaimers(...see part 1) _____________________ Childish Thoughts (part 2) by Analise H. Lyta was curled up in her favorite chair, reading a nice old-fashioned book. It had been a birthday present from the Captain and Delenn. Actual paper pages..half the fun of the thing was just touching it. The security channels were on the speaker, turned low...a habit from the Shadow Wars when she'd been needed on a moments notice. Now it was just a steady hum of words and reports in the background, she ignored them. Though she did make idle note that a medteam had just been called in to the docking bays to wait for an incoming ship. She reached across the arm of the chair to where her tea steeped in a cup on the end table and brought it to her mouth without a break in reading. The steaming hot drink paused midway to her mouth though, and her eyes lost focus. An odd presence...no, more like a force... She frowned and extended her senses a bit. Her tea sloshed onto her lap as she jerked in shock. What *was* that?! She set her book and her tea down and closed her eyes, ignoring the burn on her leg from the hot water and concentrated on the ..thing....It was strong...so...strong. And disorienting. Swirling colors..no..images. A planet...Epsilon III? Shadows...swarming...explosions...hard to distinguish between one thought to the next. But overlying it all....a familiar face. David Sheridan..and then it was gone. Lyta hit her link. "C&C..patch me through to Captain Sheridan.." she said, her book lying forgotten on the chair next to her. "Sorry ma'am...but the Captain's turned off his link. Maybe I can route you to the Chief?" Lyta paused a moment. What did she have to go on..really? A vague feeling? It was gone now anyway..why bother the Station? If it came again...then she would take it to the Captain..but for now..she had nothing to tell him...except that it involved some old memories and his son. She grimaced to herself. "Never mind C&C...out" It sifted through the boy's memories, his knowledge. It was gaining more than just a cohesion of thought..it was also learning. It was too much to hope for..that this creature held the answers it craved...but there it was. Its myriad, shifting facets seemed to focus then. It knew, it remembered now..what it was...what it had been. And it knew what it had to do now. It collected itself to leave the boy...and ..something stopped it. It milled in confusion, and tried again to vacate the child. Again, it was unable to. Finally...after a moment, the entity realized.. with its new clarity of thought...that the very thing that enabled it to think more clearly..was also the thing that held it there. The boy. It had used the boy's mind to gather itself in...to discover purpose and direction...and it now could not do it without him. If it left the child..it would again become the aimless, meaningless mass of emotion and thought it had been before. The thing paused, momentarily stumped by the conundrum it was presented with. It needed to go...it *wanted* to go. The thrill of having a direction after so long was intoxicating...it would not give it up. But to go...it would have to leave the boy..and then it would no longer *want* anything. A long moment later...and it knew what it had to do. At least someone had closed his eyes, John thought, as he stood in Medlab looking through the thick plexi that separated him from his son. He was still clad in his flight suit, unmindful of the fact that it was bulky and uncomfortable. They had put David in isolation, telling John that until they knew what was wrong with him, it was better to be safe than sorry...especially after John had told them about the strange emissions they had flown through. Stephan had made him promise to let them take a look at him as well, and he had agreed without an argument. The sound of footfalls to his right made him look up ..knowing who it was instinctively. Delenn hurried to his side, her face filled with fear. He drew her close against him, clinging to her as much as she was to him as they both stared through the glass. David didn't even look pale. He looked like he was sleeping. It was only the fact that he lay unnaturally still..and on his back with his limbs neatly arranged..that broke the illusion. "What...what happened?" Delenn's voice made him look down at her. She looked on the verge of crying, but she was keeping it back with sheer force of will. He squeezed her closer to his side, swallowing as he noted the stiffness in her shoulders that spoke of a second emotion ...anger. "I...I don't know." his voice was rough. " We were just cruising around Epsilon III...there was some kind of strange reading on the scanner...I still don't know what it was....I'm having someone going over the scanner records now..but it's unlikely that the emissions are more than a coincidence, since I was unaffected. I looked back, and he was just ...like that. One minute he was talking to me...the next..." he trailed off, his eyes going back to the slight figure of his son in the isolab, guilt and worry radiating off of him. Delenn still did not look up at him, her eyes were fastened on her child...lying there, hooked up to more machinery than she'd even known existed in Medlab. "And what does the Doctor say?" she asked faintly..knowing the answer already. "He doesn't know. They are running tests. So far, Stephan says that his brain activity is higher than normal...but its unnatural." "Unnatural?" "There's a lot of activity in certain areas that don't normally show so much..something like that..I don't know.." he pinched the bridge of his nose between his fingers then, closing his eyes in frustration. "I just wish that I could DO something...I feel so...helpless.." he whispered. He resisted the urge to hit something. He felt Delenn move away from his side, and when he looked up, she was standing closer to the transparent plexisteel barrier. "Delenn?" he asked..wanting to know how she felt...unconsciously wanting her to take some of the guilt off his shoulders. She finally did look at him, and her eyes were green shards of anguish. "You HAD to take him out there. You HAD to ..." she choked to a halt, then took a deep breath and continued. "He was too young to go out in a fighter...men train for years to properly handle the effects of extreme gees..and you took out a *9* year old boy*! I knew something like this would happen..but I left it to your better judgement. It would be fine, you said...well, does it look *fine*?" Her eyes were blazing ...and still too dry.. John opened his mouth, his own anger rising up..but then he shut it again as she turned her face back to the barrier and pressed her forehead against it...squeezing her eyes closed. Instead, he moved to pull her into his arms again. Closing his own eyes and pressing his face into the fragrant crown of her hair, he felt her body finally begin to shake in great heaving sobs against his chest...her tears soaking through the outer layer of his suit. After an eternity in which they simply held each other and cried, she moved across the floor and hooked a chair under one hand, dragging it across the floor...wiping her eyes with the other. She gently shoved him backwards until he sat. "I'll go and fetch you some fresh clothes..." she said softly, then turned and left at a brisk pace. He knew that Delenn was not finished with him..she was trying to deal with her own fear by keeping busy. He knew that she was right in part. David had been too young to take out in a zero-gee fighter. But he had been so anxious to fulfil his son's dream... it had been a dream that he identified with. He would have given anything to be able to go out in a fighter when he was David's age...and he had wanted to give that to his son. But look at the consequences. It was a high price to pay...just to be able to fulfil his own childhood fantasy. He bent over, pressing his face into his hands. Please let him be alright..he whispered inside his mind...please. Gently, quietly..it sank into the nooks and crannies of David's mind. It wrapped itself in layers of the boys own memories, incorporating itself inside his head. It knew where David was hiding...and it left him...that core soul of him, alone. It had no desire to tamper with the child's sanity..that would destabilize it's own goals. Instead, it went about its work systematically.... ..gaining an identity the longer it stayed with David. It knew now, that it had lived on the planet below..had cared for ...had been part of it. And there were other pieces of it that knew other things, remembered seeing the universe stretch out before it in a huge expanse....a giant cornucopia of knowledge and wisdom..remembered fixing a circuit here, adjusting a capacitor there...so much..and it was all coming back in bits. That still confused it a little. Why bits? Why such different bits? Some of the memories it could access now were vast and timeless..and others were simple mundane things ..like sweeping a corridor. It determined to save the mystery for a later time. Right now, the boy was stirring in his hidey hole. It was almost done anyway. When the boy awoke, he would barely notice that it was there at all. He might have a few new memories here and there..but if it did its job right, the child would simply not notice. It slithered the last pieces of itself into Davids own thoughts, and waited. They had finished their tests, unhooked the equipment and left David lying there with only the brain scanner still on. It was the only anomaly they could find...except for the small cavity that was developing in his lower left molar. Franklin had added the last in an half-hearted attempt to lighten the grim mood..but it hadn't worked. "If its just a simple state of catatonia...there's nothing we can do except wait for him to wake up on his own. I'm sure he'll come around any time now. Besides the heightened brain activity..which is normal in most of these.... cases...he's fine. There's no physical reason why he should be this way." He moved aside and set down the datapad with the results of the scans, glancing up to see if they had any questions..both of them looked like hell. And both of them remained silent. "There is one small thing that I've found...I can't be positive without a bit more observation of his brain scans...." "What?" Delenn asked, waiting for more bad news with a heavy heart. "I can't say until I know more...I'll let you know as soon as I do, though. Don't worry. I've seen these kinds of catatonic shock cases last no longer than a few days at most." "All of them?" Sheridan grated, knowing the answer already. Franklin sighed. "No...not all..." And after a moment, Franklin left them. David had been moved out of the isolab, and he now lay on a regular treatment bed..completely still. Only the quiet rise and fall of his ribcage and the swirling colors on the screen overhead denoting brain activity..told them he was alive. It had been 8 hours now since Sheridan had pulled his son out of the cockpit of the Fury, and there was no change. Delenn settled down on a stool next to the bed. "Why don't you go ahead and get some sleep..freshen up a bit.." she said absently, "I'll watch him." "I'd like to stay a little longer...." he said, sinking into another chair by the door. There were circles under his eyes and he looked haggard. He ran a hand through his hair and looked up at his wife.. "Delenn....I'm sorry, I...I wish that I'd listened to you...you were right, this is my fault.." his voice was a low croak of despair. Delenn didn't move, her hands folded tightly in her lap, her eyes on Davids still features, so similar to John's. She reached out and stroked the boy's cheek, then she stood and moved across the floor to her husband. He wasn't looking at her, his eyes were closed, his forehead resting against his palms. She knelt in front of him and ran her hands up his wrists until they cupped his fingers in hers. She pulled them away and brought his chin up so their eyes met. "John...you couldn't have known." she said finally, her eyes wet. "You can't blame yourself...those things I said..I-" she stopped and looked down to where she clasped his hands still. "I was upset. It was cruel of me. If there had been any chance of danger, you would *never* have taken David out there." She lifted one hand up to touch his mouth, sliding her hand back along his jaw, and moving her head down until she was resting it on his lap. He laid his hands on her hair, and they waited. Green eyes snapped open. They flicked back and forth, taking in their surroundings. There was little movement in the room beyond the glass. His parents were sleeping propped up against each other by the wall. They looked awful. There was one other in a light green coat who was standing in front of a console on the opposite side of the room. The boy sat up.He knew what he had to do. He didn't know why...but he had to. There was no other thought in his head. He slid off the bed, spotting his flight gear stowed in a corner of the room neatly folded. He slipped it on quietly, casting around for the helmet. It was nowhere to be seen. He frowned a bit, biting his lip in a characteristic gesture. He would have to find it..it was the only one of its kind on the station...it wasn't like a child's flight helmet was a normal thing. He faltered then...what was he thinking of? Taking out a fighter on his own? Impossible. There was no way. And then something seemed to fill his mind. It *was* possible. There *was* a way. It would be done...there was nothing more to think about. He would go and find the helmet, and then he would go. GO. He went. After all, it was what he always wanted, right? He stepped out into the hall, walking quietly past his sleeping parents and the busy med tech, and headed down the hall. David was a natural enough sight around the station, everyone knew who he was... unmistakable with his father's face and his mothers bonecrest...and he navigated the corridors without incident. Until he came around a corner and found Lyta standing there, blocking his way. Normally, David went to great trouble to avoid the telepath..on the grounds that he was afraid she would find out that he was himself a telepath....but now...she was even *more* threatening. David didn't know why. "David?" she asked, uncertainty in her voice, her eyes narrowed. David felt an uncontrollable surge of fear and desperation rise up in him. He didn't speak. Something was happening inside of his mind. He brought up his hands to press against his temples. Lyta's eyes widened as she sensed..something..beginning to build. She lifted one hand, as if to ward off a threat...and then the entire corridor exploded in a blast of sound and thought. Lyta was flung like a rag doll, to land 15 feet away flat on her back down the corridor..unconscious and bleeding from her ears. David stepped around her with widened eyes, his mouth working soundlessly. He didn't know what he had done...or why he had felt such a threat from her...but now he ran. "Captain!....Captain, wake up..." Sheridan cracked open eyes that were gummed over with exhaustion and worry. Delenn lay sleeping against his side. Dr. Franklin was bending over him, shaking his shoulder. "What is it?! Is something wrong with--" he stopped. He'd flashed a look at the bed, and his son was gone! "What..where..?" "I just walked in here, and saw that he was gone. He can't have gotten far..Sarah says that she just checked in on him about 10 minutes ago." Delenn was starting to stir. She noticed as soon as she opened her eyes, that David was no longer in the bed. She turned to John, her eyes wide. He had surged to his feet and slapped his link active. "Sheridan to Security.." "Security, what is it Captain?" Zacks voice answered. "Put out an alert in blue sector...keep an eye out for David, if you see him...let me know!" "David?"Zack asked, bemused. "Just do it!" Sheridan snapped. He cut the connection, and, grabbing Delenn's arm, he started to pull her after him out of Medlab. "Captain..wait just a minute.." Franklin said, hurrying after both of them, holding up the datapad that neither John or Delenn had noticed. "I almost forgot..the reason that I came down here. I found a correlation with the data that we'd collected from David's brain patterns.." "Doctor..he's obviously awake...so hasn't this become moot?" Delenn said a little impatiently. "No..this applies to David in general. I don't know how we missed it before, but David is a telepath." Ivanova was staring, flabbergasted, out the main viewport in C&C when Sheridan and Delenn rushed in. "Did I hear you right?!" Sheridan snapped at her, his blue-grey eyes slightly wild, "did you say that *David* has stolen a Star Fury?! How in *hell* is that possible?" "I don't know..the flight-deck Lieutenant is on his way up here..he seemed dazed..saying something about David leveling everyone in the Bay.." "That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard..." John fumed, moving to Delenn's side where she was staring out at the dwindling speck of light that was David...out there in space...alone. He squeezed her shoulder, and then spun. "*You* talk to the Lieutenant..I'm going after him." No one protested as the Captain stalked out of C&C. Ivanova turned a little reluctantly towards Delenn. The woman was still staring out of the viewport. Susan wasn't sure what to say. Delenn solved her problem by speaking. "Leveled.." she mused quietly. "I would almost think this might be connected to Lyta. She was found unconscious in one of the corridors ..bleeding from the ears." "You think *David* did that? No offense Delenn, but I don't think that's very realistic. How could a 9-year old boy take out a full grown adult? Even a boy who was trained on Minbar..." Delenn wasn't listening, she was frowning out the port again. "What trajectory did you say he was on?" "Well, he's not flying too clean....but near as we make, he's going to Epsilon III." "Which is where this whole thing started.." Delenn said. She was quiet for a moment as she watched a small squad of Furys sail away from the station ..heading after the stolen ship. She bit her lip..a gesture she had seen David mimicking lately. "Susan.." she began, "when was the last time we ran a sensor sweep of Epsilon III?" "Its been well over 8 years or so. Our teams never did get to the main control center, it was completely blocked with rubble down there." Susan pursed her lips. "But I think we can be certain that Draal died along with the rest of the Caretakers...our long range scans didn't pick up a single lifeform." Delenn nodded, then seemed about to say more when the door slid open and a slightly dazed looking Lieutenant walked into C&C. He moved a tad unsteadily towards Commander Ivanova and came to a halt in front of her, saluting. "You wanted to speak to me Sir?" he asked, a little too loudly..his eyes were bloodshot, it looked as though some of the smaller blood vessels in his eyes had burst. "What the hell happened down there? You want to tell me how a little boy can waltz right past over 15 adults, hop into a Star Fury, power it up, manually work the docking release clamps and then just fly away?" Susan asked, folding her arms..eyes like flint. The man was shaking his head. "I..I wish I knew Sir. I remember looking up...I was checking in some new parts....and I saw the Captain's son walk in. He's a normal enough sight around the Bay, so I thought nothing of it. Then...there was this...thunderclap of ..I don't know. Sound and ..well, it wasn't really sound...more like noise inside my head. And thoughts too...I don't know..it sounds crazy..." "Did these..thoughts...have anything to do with Epsilon III?" Delenn suddenly asked, urgency in her voice. The man jerked a little, as if stung. "Y-yeah. How did you know? *I* didn't even know until you mentioned it...but yeah, there were images ...more like *feelings* of the planet..explosions..shadow-ships..." The man was staring at the floor, one hand to his temple. Delenn was frowning, ignoring Susan's inquisitive gaze. After a long silence, Ivanova directed the man to Medlab and then folded her arms, waiting for Delenn to speak.But Delenn said nothing...nothing at all. ___________________________________________________________________ Dear Earthforce, Hate you, hate the Alliance, taking B4..... --The One From analise@verinet.com Tue Dec 24 23:21:52 1996 Date: Thu, 31 Oct 1996 13:31:08 +0000 From: Analise Hairabedian To: b5-creative@lists.best.com Subject: Childish Thoughts---part 3 (NEW STORY) Heres the last part ....same disclaimers as before..yatta, yatta, yatta...... _____________________ Childish Thoughts (part 3) By Analise H. Sheridan sped towards the planet, following more by instinct than by his instruments. He knew that this whole nonsense had to do with that strange reading he'd gotten just before David had gone all strange. A telepath. How could they not have known? The little rat..he's been hiding it for who knew how long...was that why he was acting so oddly now? Somehow John didn't think so. It was one thing to be a telepath and quite another to be able to knock 15 adults into a stupor. No..something was definitely wrong...and he planned on finding out what. He had David's Star Fury in sight now. The boy was flying like someone who didn't really know what he was doing. John knew that he'd spent a lot of time in simulators..but reality was always different..no matter how realistic you made a simulator. In a way it was slightly reassuring that David could barely handle the Fury...the one normal thing so far. He was outstripping his escort, and gaining on the awkwardly flying stolen fury. He watched as his son made a barely passable entry angle into the remainder of Epsilon III's atmosphere..the extension wings barely coming down in time...almost like an afterthought. Gritting his teeth at the thought of what would have happened to the fighter if David had made the descent angle even one degree sharper..he himself took the steepest possible angle and plunged in after the boy. The fighter landed hard on the rocky surface of the planet, and David felt a sharp pain as he bit his tongue on impact. It had been more than a little terrifying flying the fighter by himself, and he could feel his bones quaking under his flight suit. Swallowing, ignoring his fear..he pushed open the canopy and looked around the barren wasteland that was Epsilon III. He had landed very near to an outcrop of rock that jutted violently from the surface of the planet. Now he headed for it..stumbling over the sharp stones that littered the ground. He barely heard the reentry roar of a second Fury's engines overhead...so intent was he on that outcrop. He felt almost euphoric for some reason he could not determine the closer that he got to it. After almost half an hour of struggling over the uneven, razorlike rocks, he arrived at the face of the outcrop. It loomed 500 feet over him, towering into the bruised sky above. Without another thought, he went directly to a crack in the side, and vanished from sight. Sheridan could see David ahead, moving purposefully towards a towering, volcanic outcrop that seemed to split the surface of the planet. He could feel the biting wind of the planet's unfriendly atmosphere digging at the suit he wore as he moved as quickly as he could after his son. He knew by now that David was most certainly not himself. As stubborn as the boy could be sometimes..he would never do something like this. And he was moving towards that rock like he had a purpose. John knew that whatever those strange readings they had flown through had been, it was controlling David somehow. For some reason. He watched as the boy disappeared into a rift in the face of the rock, and he picked up his pace...trying to keep his eye on his son at the same time as struggling over the uneven surface. He was only 10 minutes or so behind him...but the longer he ran..the more he thought about it...the more urgent he became. What could possibly make David do this, and why? What if they had picked up some sort of remnant of the Great Machine while they were out there? Something that might take over another person...perhaps for the purpose of renewing Epsilon III? Sheridan gritted his teeth. If whatever was controlling David wanted to plug him into the planet...wanted to merge him with the Great Machine much as Drall had once been......well, they were going to have to go through him to do it! He had reached the crack that his son had vanished through. He heard the sound of his escort arriving at last, their retros whining in the thin atmosphere. Barely paying any attention, he tore off one of his patches from his suit and jammed it into a crack near the rift. If they saw it, fine...if not, he wasn't going to wait for them. He turned sideways, and slid into the crack. It was definitely sloping downwards...and after a while, he was able to turn his shoulders and walk normally. It was getting darker with every step, and he paused for a moment to pull a tiny utility light out of his pocket. It didn't provide much light..but it helped a lot. He moved into a trot, hoping that David's progress would be slowed by the darkness. It felt like hours before he came into a hall....a hall that he recognized as being part of the warren of corridors that riddled Epsilon III. Everything was dark, parts of the ceiling were strewn on the floor...entire walls blackened by electrical fire.And he stopped. He had no way of knowing which direction his son had gone. He got down on one knee and peered at the floor through the faceplate of his suit. He noted idly that small beads of condensation were forming on the inside of the mask. That was not a good sign. He checked his oxygen readout. Only a few hours left. He guessed that it had taken a very long time indeed to get down here. Pushing thoughts of asphyxiation out of his mind, he concentrated on finding David...knowing that the boy's suit had a much lower supply of emergency oxygen than his did. There was a faint bootprint to his right. Immediately, he began running down the sharply descending corridor..hoping that it was the right way....praying that he could get to his son before he was plugged into the Machine as he suspected he would be. Praying that even if he was too late..he could still disentangle David from the dead planet before any damage was done to his mind. David was tired and scared, but he kept walking...something was guiding his feet. It was pitch dark, but somehow he knew the way. He moved agilely down the long, long descending path until he came out onto relatively flat ground. He was starting to have a little difficulty breathing, but he couldn't stop..he kept going...moving through the blackness with purpose. He was starting to feel excited...anticipating something...he knew not what. The corridor was still sloping steeply downwards, but the going was much easier than it had been in the crack..at least the floor was smooth. He noted offhandedly that there was less and less rubble the further down they went. There was a dim light ahead, and he moved towards it..his excitement growing. `Almost. Almost', he found himself thinking. He rounded a corner and found himself gazing at a large round room. There was a single light hanging from a wire to one side..the source of the glow. It was dim and flickering, but still on. It cast murky shadows off of the odd brass colored contraption on the far wall. David felt a shock run through him as he saw a burned and blackened skeleton hanging in the wires amongst the twisted metal. Long brown robes hung in charcoal tatters from the singed bones. He felt part of him cry out in surprise and another part take a morbid little-boy fascination in the skeleton. It had been a Minbari...he noted, seeing the headbone. Draal, part of him cried. David knew that he had heard the name before..or had he? He put a hand to his chest. It was getting strangely tight, he was starting to feel tired...but he moved forward. A footstep sounded in the corridor and he spun in surprise. A tall man in an earthforce flight suit came around the corner. David felt himself cry out in relief and joy. "Papa!" he exclaimed, wanting to run to him. In that moment he felt all the fear and confusion rush him at once. Why was he here? What had he done to those people in the docking bay...to Lyta? Had he really flown a Fury all by himself? And then it vanished again, and he felt anger replace the joy...fear replace the relief. "PAPA!" David cried out..knowing what he was going to do next. And he did it. He felt himself focus his thoughts..emotions...into once direct pulse of energy...and fling them at his father. He watched in terror as Sheridan went flying backwards to slam bodily against the far wall of the corridor. Tears were running down his face as he tried to run to his father, but instead he turned away...and walked towards the skeleton hanging in the machinery. Sheridan hauled himself to his feet unsteadily, his head spinning. Pieces of the corridor were raining down around him from the force of the blast that David had directed at him. A faint rumbling did not inspire confidence as to the continuing stability of the ceiling. He felt himself blinking moisture out of stinging eyes and felt sure that David had broken blood vessels in them. He clenched his jaw. If he had had any doubts before, they had just been quelled by what David had just done. The boy was sobbing openly..but he had turned and walked towards what was left of Drall. Sheridan noted bleakly that the entire control complex of what had once been the heart of the Great Machine was now little more than metal scrap. Whatever had happened on Epsilon III must have sent energy feedback the likes of which no one had ever seen..straight into the brain of the thing...namely, Draal. Sheridan didn't want to think what might possibly happen to David if even one of the myriad parts of Epsilon still functioned. He staggered forward as the rumbling in the walls and ceiling increased. Hopefully his escort would arrive soon...if they had managed to follow his trail. And then a large portion of the ceiling detached itself, crumbling towards him. He gasped and flung himself to the side. The main portion missed him by inches, but the rubble that accompanied it managed to land squarely on his right leg, trapping him. David had turned to look at him, eyes wide and terrified, mouth working soundlessly...but had then returned his attention to the machinery around Draal's desiccated corpse. Sheridan gritted his teeth against the pain. He couldn't be sure, but he thought it was broken. He had had broken limbs before and this was very similar. He began to beat at the rock that had him pinned, but it was immobile..and all he could do was curse as he watched his trembling son pull the remains of Drall out of the metal embrace of the Machine. "David! Don't...don't go near the thing...its dead!" David paid him no mind. Sheridan tried a different tack. "Whatever...whoever you are.... .please, he's just a child. You don't know what putting him in that thing will do to him...." Still no response. "Damn you! What are you doing?!" Finally, David turned to him...green eyes still tear-streaked..but now they were eerily cold. "Do not interfere..the boy is fighting...it makes this...more difficult.." John felt his blood turn chilly at the words. They were exactly what he had been dreading. "W-what do you plan on doing? TheMachine is dead...it would take a hundred years to repair all this damage..." John tried to put his most reasonable tone in his voice. "It will be repaired. Things will be as they were." "And what are you going to do with David?" John said, his voice rising. "He will be free. The Machine is here...it knows what to do." "Free?! Free? What does that mean? Dammit, give me back my son!" Sheridan's composure snapped. David turned back to the wall, pulling a blackened arm bone out of one of the slots....a cable had been fused to the hand bones and the boy dispassionately banged the cable against the wall , breaking away the clenched fist until the cable was clear. John swallowed when he saw a tiny spark jump from the end of the conduit..the damned thing still had power..somehow. He began to struggle ferociously then as he saw what David was doing. The boy had one cable in one hand and he was reaching for the other. He completed the circuit and John was horrified to see his son's body arch back in shock as energy suddenly surged around him, crackling and dancing. "NOOO!" he screamed. It was then that two men in Earthforce flight suits came barreling around the corner, only to stop dead at the sight of their commanding officer lying on the floor in a pile of rubble...and his son standing in a pile of bones, bathed in an electric glow. One man leaped to help Sheridan move the rock from his leg, while the other hurtled the debris in the room to tear David away from the wall. He was only partway across when the energy ceased...and David crumpled..lifeless..to the floor. "David!" John cried out, using the man at his side to haul himself to his feet. Then, ignoring his broken leg, he lurched across the room to nearly fall on top of his son. David was bone white, the skin under his eyes a pasty blue..his lips the same color. John groped through the suit for some sign of life..but could detect none. He was heedless of the tears that were spilling down his cheeks, drenching the neck of his suit. This couldn't be happening....9 years old, this wasn't possible. "His suit...it's out of oxygen.." One of the men said grimly. John noticed that the O2 level was indeed, at zero. He glanced at his..almost empty as well. They would never make it all the way back to the surface..and he didn't have enough to even give to his son. "Pierson should be here soon with oxygen reserves from the fighters, Captain.." one of the men said. "We sent him back to the surface after we realized how far down you must have gone." No one said the obvious..that even if David wasn't already dead from that energy surge, the oxygen would have to arrive immediately for him to survive...and the two men had only just gotten there. John bowed his head in despair, pulling the slight figure of the boy against his chest..clutching him like a drowning man clutches a life-preserver. And then....the lights around the perimeter...the ones that were not blackened by fire..began to flicker..and then shine. The two pilots looked up and around them, blinking at the sudden dim brightness with eyes used to hours of dark. A faint noise could be heard...a soft sighing sound. It was then that John looked up, blinking. "That sound..." he said quietly. He knew it. It was a sound that had accompanied his visits to Epsilon back in the days before it was destroyed. He *knew* it. He made a choking sound and then ..without another word..and unmindful of the protests of the two pilots..he unlocked the clasps at his neck...and pulled off his helmet. He opened his mouth..and forced himself to take a breath. Air. It was dusty, tasted of burn and corrosion..but it was air. He flung his helmet to the side and immediately began to fumble at the release on his son's. A moment later he had the thing off and he dove for the pulse at David's neck. It was gone...nothing. Gasping back a sob, he shook his head. "No" he whispered. "No!" He bent over the boy and began to breath into his mouth. One-two-three-four-five...pull back....pump the chest, one-two-three-four-five. Again... again. He felt himself getting dizzy...and one of the men put a hand on his shoulder. Sheridan simply shrugged it off. There was no way he was going to let his son die. Again.... again. And then...a faint cough. Holding his breath now, he quickly pulled David into a partially sitting position against his chest so that he could breath easier. The boy coughed again, his eyelashes fluttering against pale cheeks..and then green eyes were looking blearily up at him. "Papa?" he whispered. John was too overcome with relief to form words. He simply pulled the boy against his chest and closed his eyes. "So you say that the Great Machine is still alive?" Delenn asked, her voice hushed as they stood over David's bedside. They were not in Medlab. Dr. Franklin had not felt it necessary to keep him there..he had just given the exhausted parents strict instructions that pertained to rest and quiet. `His mind is swimming right now...whatever that was...it used parts of his mind he probably didn't even know he had...the chemical levels in his brain are almost off the scale. Just let him sleep...and don't upset him.' Franklin had said. John leaned on his cane and looked down at the boy ruefully. Lucky for him. This telepathy thing was going to have to be dealt with. "It would seem so." John said, looking down at his wife where she sat next to the bed. "Whatever it was..it seems to know how to operate the thing. We're already reading new power surges down there. Maybe it was never really completely dead at all..maybe it just shut down when Draal was killed" He shrugged. "I hadn't thought that the thing could really operate without a mind to run it..." He sighed. "But I guess I was wrong.." "Draal always said that the Machine itself seemed to have a conciousness of its own... perhaps when it was damaged..the . ."personality"..was dislodged..." Delenn mused, " and that is what entered David.. At least it didn't decide to keep him....", her low voice was filled with relief. "From what Draal had told me long ago..the Great Machine took a great deal of discipline to control..a lesser mind than his would not have stayed sane..." "That's what I thought...I...I was so afraid that .." he trailed off, looking down at his sleeping son, as if to reaffirm that he was really there. Delenn reached out and took his hand, squeezing it gently. He redirected his gaze to her and smiled. She gestured at his leg. "Why don't you sit here.." she said, getting up. "Your leg must be hurting you.." He sank down gratefully and then pulled her into his lap. "John...your leg.." she protested. He chuckled softly. "Don't worry..you're no burden...." his smile faded a little as he looked back down at David. "What are we going to do about this?" "The telepathy?" Delenn asked, leaning back against his chest. She smiled softly against the fabric of his shirt. "We'll have to learn how to raise a telepath, I suppose." She craned her neck to look up at him, and he sighed. "I suppose" he repeated. He squeezed her more tightly against him. "I have a feeling.." he said slowly... "that the past 24 hours were only a taste of the joys that having a telepathic son will provide." Delenn giggled softly. "Whatever comes...look at it as a challenge.." she said. "Whats one more?" It was home...it was different somehow...but it was home. There was much work to do, things that would take a century to repair...but the task did not intimidate. Instead, it gave a deep sense of belonging and purpose. The coherance the boy had provided was gone..but it had been replaced by the Machine itself. Now it inviegled itself into each crack and cranny of the planet's mainframe...using its own myriad facets of knowledge to determine what needed to be fixed and what was still functioning. Now that it was once again a part of the whole...however damaged, it was beginning to think more clearly...starting to understand what had happened..and what would happen. When the Shadows had attacked Epsilon...a massive power feedback had surged through all the systems of the planet. Draal had tried to control it..tried to divert it...and had, in doing so, pulled a large amount of the damage into himself. He had died, but he had saved a large part of the planet's systems in the sacrifice. He had also attempted to store a portion of the Machine's higher brain functions and knowledge in a protected area...and he had partially succeeded. It recognized itself in the echoes of the disaster that had expelled it into space...and odd collection of the thoughts, memories and emotions of those who worked within the Great Machine. A bit of Draal here and there, all overlaid by the conciousness of the Machine itself. With each passing minute that it spent back within the Machine, the more it realized who and what it was...and was no longer. It also knew that things were different now. What Draal had done in his sacrifice...was to imbue an almost living conciousness into the Machine itself...a conciousness that melded with what the Great Machine already possessed. And now, it knew that it was part of that. It could run the planet itself..there would no longer be a need for an organic being to become the central brain for the Machine. It was everyone and everything that had been part of Epsilon III. And there was a tiny part of it now..that grounded it in the universe. A part of it that echoed of green eyes and sandy hair and a lust for star fighters ....and of childish thoughts. END ___________________________________________________________________ Dear Earthforce, Hate you, hate the Alliance, taking B4..... --The One