name = Kim Bailey email = kim@softarc.com title = B5 Controversial Secret Ending warnings = Some swearing and suggestive phrases story = Okay, so here it is.... The unpublished very controversial secret ending to the original B5 series... (Whoops! THIS is the finished version... You just gotta be careful with a keyboard!... ) Cut to Corianna 3 scene with Sheridan alone in his own personal (mini) whitestar. The ship is dark and subdued, almost as if it too is holding its mechanized breath waiting for the final play in this man's life struggle. We watch helplessly as the life slowly fades from Sheridan's haggard face, the light glow that powered it with stern determination through 4 seasons and twenty years beyond, fading into the shadows of the cockpit. We observe, then hope lifts as we become aware of another glow from without now taking it's place... The camera cuts to a view from behind Sheridan's stooped shoulders facing towards the front of the craft where we now can clearly see a familiar ball of light speeding towards the craft. Soon we hear the almost forgotten questions as they echo through the tiny cabin; "Who are you?" "Why are you here?..." And now, much more localized from beside Sheridan himself... "And just where the Hell am I?"... The camera now cuts to beside Sheridan's tired face, his heavy eyes opening as his head slowly turns to face the source of this last question. "Huh?" The camera now focuses in on the form of a man that has materialized next to Sheridan. We observe the quiet stance, the short dark curly hair and the look of a man who has seen and dreamed it all... Sheridan squints his tired eyes in recognition of this newcomer. The fact that he has just materialized on his bridge does not surprise him. A man who has been touched by Vorlons can never be surprised.... A man who is already half dead doesn't really do the whole 'surprise' thing very well either... Take your pick... "Haven't I seen you someplace before?" He croaks out a question. "Wasn't it on an old TV show called 'The man from Atlantis'? You used to go this ghastly shade of deep purple when you weren't wet.... Something like dehydrated sea monkeys..." "Damn!" Patrick Duffy replied, annoyed with this surprising turn in recognition. The reaction caused him to uncounciously scratch at the almost forgotten remainder of the phoney gill slits on the side of his neck. " I thought everyone had forgotten about that series! Don't you remember Dallas at all?" "I might have dreamed about something called that once or twice..." Sheridan offered by way of apology. "Wasn't that about a Texas Millionare and his brother and their oil business and their sleazy wives and their sleazy Armadilloes and all of them chasing longhorn cattle around butt naked..." "How the hell did you hear about that off set joke!?" Duffy demanded, impatiently cutting him off. "Larry promised me up and down that he wouldn't tell a soul! How did you find out about it?" "I was tortured by Earth Force once..." Sheridan croaked his explanation. "You have no idea the depths they will go to break a man down..." "I'm beginning to get the picture..." Duffy answered. He frowned a bit then snapped his fingers while he brightened up considerably. "Well, at least we got 9 years, plus all those syndicated reruns out of our series. It sure beats the hell out of that... that... What did you call it?... Mrs. Somebody and the scarecrow?... Wasn't that just a cheap trick to keep one of the original 'Charlies Angel's' from starving?" "I didn't think so at the time..." Sheridan said, rubbing his forehead as another wave of weakness passed through him. With his free hand he waved a dismissal in Duffy's direction. "Anyway, I don't have any time to think about past mistakes. If I did, I'd have to dwell on the bone headed stunt of having my ex-wife replace my command position on the damned station!" "That was dumb, yes..." Duffy Conceded. "Even Larry wasn't that stupid." "You have no idea of the nightmare I had just trying to get my office trinkets back!" Sheridan shook his head. "Anyway, just what the hell are you doing on my ship? Can't a man simply run out of energy in peace and quiet, anymore? I came all the way out here to get away from my last wife and kid and you show up! What's this universe coming to, anyway?" "Oh yeah?" Duffy shot back. "How do you think I feel? I was beginning to hope that I was about to discover that my 20 year career downturn was all just a dream and I was about to wake up as Tatoo on "Fantasy Island' or at least on the Vorlon Homeworld with Lyta Alexander in an encounter suit neglegie and instead I ended up here, with another has been..." He snorted in reaction and kicked at a console. "Oh no.. No such luck for me! Besides, you can't fool me!" He almost yelled triumphantly. "You were expecting a visitor anyway." "Oh yeah?" Sheridan challenged. " Who?" "Someone else." Duffy teased. "Who???" Sheridan almost roared in his exasperation. The only thing that stopped him was his amazing Mimbari learned self control discipline and the fact that he was now 3/4 dead which is not very conducive to raising your voice in any way at all. "All right..." Duffy yawned. I'll tell you who... That Lorien guy." "Lorien?" Sheridan gasped. " He was coming here?" "Yep." Duffy smirked. "To see me?" "That's right!" Duffy yawned. "Just before I died?" "Of course!" "Maybe to zap me with some more juice and turn me into a new creature that will go back with him to the realms beyond the rim and live forever as a new type of Mimbari Demi-God to create even more stupid legends and force Delenn to sit on that stupid stone bench which seriously aggrevated my hemroids, every morning for the rest of her life, watching the damned sun coming up and maybe to have the power to be able to fly unimpeded by weak physcial flesh through the entire known universe, to see wonders that have never been seen by human eyes, to dwell in places unaccessable by human beings, to meet John Delancy in one of those higher planes of reality and to finally be able to sneak into Susan Ivonova's bedroom without setting off any of her security traps to see her more naked than she was in that 'Hexxed' publicity shot???...." "Geeze, after forming the Interstellar alliance, you didn't get out much, did you?" Duffy observed knowingly. "Well, yes, yes and more yes..., except of course about the last point..." "I won't be able to come back?" "No you won't be able to see Ivonova naked. She sleeps in a suit of armor. I think she even wears it under her underwear. I know... I was there dammit!" He subconciously rubbed his crotch and winced. "I see..." Sheridan reflected nodding gravely. Then with the last of his rapidly dissappating energy he glanced around. "So, where is he?" "Where's who?" "Lorien!" Sheridan snapped. "You said he was coming. Isn't he cutting it just a little fine? In case you hadn't noticed, I'm running out of time, here!" "Oh THAT Lorien..." Duffy nodded. "Well he's not coming now." "He isn't?" "No." Duffy said. "He was, but not anymore. Warner brothers just took billions of dollars and convinced JMS to do 30 more B5 seasons with only a very few agreed upon 'modifications' to make it more 'mainstream' I was sent instead." "No!" "Yes. I'm to instruct you that the last 4 seasons were all a dream and you are about to wake up from a daydream in the private washroom off your B5 office." "But what about my great dying scene?" Sheridan whined, already feeling stronger despite of himself. "There are people out there in Hollywood that have been waiting twenty years for me to die! My wife has been waiting ever since the day that I took her off the "Little House on the Praire' set! How the hell will I ascend to greater evolutionary heights? Just how will I catch up to Sinclair now? Won't I ever get to see a 'Q'??" "Stupid! A 'Q' is from that 'other' show which I can't name!" Duffy snorted out a disgusted reply. "Geeze! I haven't been this embarrased about something since the time Sinclair questioned how many Vorlons could actually inhabit an encounter suit and upon opening Kosh's heard all the elves singing 'Follow the yellowbrick road'. All that foolishness over the station's damned occupancy tax... Anyway, you sure as hell won't get to ascend into Demi-God status unless you decide by the 8th season to assume the Centari throne. Then, and only then you might get a crack at it, providing someone decides to poison you... besides, they only gave it to OHare to keep him from screaming about a breach in his contract. It's much harder to kick up in a petty fuss over little things like that when the whole of Hollywood now considers you a superior life form. Something like Oliver Stone and maybe Natasha Henstridge in her human form..." "But.. but... What about B5?" Sheridan stammered. "What about the station itself? When I left there a little while ago Zack said something about destroying it? What about that?" "Relax will you!..." Duffy soothed. "That's all being taken care of! Turns out JMS had a ton load of alternate scripts. Warner Brothers just picked out a few of what they thought were the best ones to jump start the new seasons That's going into place even as we speak..." Duffy glanced at his watch and looked around. "Anyway, I gotta run." He explained, suddenly grinning in anticipation. "I may get a chance to do a guest shot as a freelance gynacologist in a new Baywatch episode and I'm not going to miss that opportunity! So, to get home now, you merely need to close your eyes, click the heels of your boots together and repeat after me... There's no place like home... There's no place like home... There's no place like.... The camera fades from Boxleiter and Duffy as Duffy waves a magic tricorder around Sheridan's head. Scene cuts to JMS's cameo role as a technician working in a desperate hurry to rewire a small access console. Finshing his task he pauses knowingly and for several time weighted seconds glances around him before throwing the now fateful switch. The station begins to groan and shudder dramatically as a massive change begins to happen... Like a huge transformer it begins to assume a new, updated shape... Soon the change is finished. Within all the Interstellar alliance's observing ships all were muted with mixed feelings of wonder, shock and amazement. Finally, Geribaldi breaks the strained silence... "Er... I know we're being payed big bucks not to notice these things... but... doesn't the transformed stattion look like... um... a replication of Paramount's 'Voyager'?.... The end... Maybe... -----------------------------------------------