From: derek@anxst.com Subject: Some Thoughts Before Leaving Date: Thu, 24 Jul 1997 14:16:11 -0700 (PDT) name = Sharon Graves email = sharong@reninet.com title = Some Thoughts Before Leaving story = "Some Thoughts Before Leaving" by sharong@reninet.com [AT][F][SC] Hello all, This is my first attempt at fanfic. I've never really considered myself a writer but so many of you have made similar comments and then written such wonderful stories! You have inspired me to give it a try. There has been a lot of discussion on the J&D Forum about episode 422 and how JMS would *wrap up* his story. This short scene was suggested by those discussions, so in a sense I feel that many of the forum members are partial authors of this piece. The discussion regarding whether JMS would put a marriage ceremony and a funeral in the same episode prompted me to come up this story line. I hope you enjoy it. Warning: Slush ahead..... All characters belong to JMS, PTEN, WB, whatever. They certainly don't belong to me. Some Thoughts Before Leaving by sharong@reninet.com The spirit hovered momentarily, looking down at group of faces gathered around the shell that once housed the soul of John Sheridan. They all meant so much to the spirit that it hesitated leaving even though it was being drawn steadily into the light. So many events had been shared with this group of friends and loved ones. Susan Ivanova & Marcus Cole....how he had enjoyed watching them spar with each other until finally they realized just how much caring, and in a sense, foreplay, lay in their constant verbal fencing matches. He was so proud of Susan and all she had accomplished. Her promotion to Admiral was well deserved. And Marcus, who had been appointed the head of the Rangers years ago when Delenn felt that she could not adequately juggle being Ambassador, Entil'Zha, wife, and mother. Lyta Alexander who with the company of Delenn and Susan had braved the trip to Z'Ha'Dum to see if he was indeed still alive. Lyta had been instrumental in defeating Kosh's replacement and helping develop the mind blocks to defeat both the Shadows and the Vorlons. Lizzy, his sister, his playmate, and sometimes tormentor as siblings can often be. The proud and fierce Neroon who took so long to become a friend but once he did was a firm friend and allay till the end. Franklin, who had worked so hard to try to extend his life just a few more days, brought his son into the world, saw his family through every cold and sniffle. His son David, how proud he was of the man he had become. John had tried to pass on all the lessons he had learned from his father to David while allowing David's own soul and personality to develop. He was second in command of the rangers now. John remembered the wonderful day marking the birth of his son eighteen years ago. It seemed only yesterday that he cradled his son in his arms and gently tossed him up in the air while David gurgled with delight. Now tall and strong in his rangers cape David stood by with his arms around Delenn supporting her. *Take good care of you mother* John's spirit whispered to David. And finally his beloved Delenn, the other half of his soul. Even after death he could still not find the words to adequately express all the love he felt for her and all that she meant to him. He ached for her now as he was unable to take her in his arms to comfort her as he wanted to do. He willed her to be strong and whispered to her that she would never really be alone, that he would be waiting for her in that place where no shadows fell. In some sense it seemed like years ago that Lorien had told him that within twenty years he would just stop. In other senses it seemed like it had only been yesterday. A ghost of a humorous old earth saying passed through the consciousness of his spirit....something about how time flies when you're having a good time. *Well, then I must have had one hell of a great time*. So many events that had changed the galaxy for the better passed through his thoughts....most memorably the end of the Shadow War, freeing the galaxy from the influences of the Vorlons and Shadows forever, the overthrow of Earth Gov with its iron fist control and anti-alien sentiments, and finally his role in helping to find a cure for the deadly virus that the Shadow agents had left behind. He found that he could see into his friends' thoughts and picked up some of the images going through their minds at this time. Susan, thinking back on the loss of so many others over the years. She still missed Girabaldi with his wacky sense of humor. Michael had died years before on Mars in the war to free Earth from President Clark's dictatorship. And Talia, who had meant so much to her, destroyed by the Psi Corp in their constant drive to develop new and stronger telepaths. David was thinking back on old Ambassador G'Kar, remembering the training sessions of fighting techniques that he and G'Kar had had. G'Kar had passed beyond the veil a few years ago, still in a constant struggle with Londo Mollari even to the death. And his good friend Lennier who had so patiently played with him and tutored him for years. Lennier had passed beyond the veil while protecting his mother, Delenn, from an attack by the Nightwatch forces. Ah, but the thoughts of his beloved Delenn, the other half of him. They were a random jumble of images going from the first moment that she saw John, through their shy and hesitant courtship, to the small intimate wedding ceremony that was a beautiful combination of Minbari and Human traditions, to a passionate but tender wedding night where John showed her that there was so much more to human relations than what she had read about in the computer archives. From there he was reminded with humor some of the things she had called him in Minbari while going through the painful process of giving birth to his son. John never knew that Delenn even knew some of those words! Oh, how he loved her! The spirit knew it was time to be going. The light beyond the veil beckoned to him and he felt himself being drawn into it. The explorer in him looked forward to the prospect of new adventures and he looked forward to being reunited with other friends....Lorien, Kosh, his father. He saw his friends becoming smaller as he was slowly pulled farther away from them into another dimension of existence. His friends all looked at each other with amazement as they felt rather than heard his last words to all of them....We are all starstuff....I will await the day when we will all meet again in a place were no shadows fall. [END] -----