Date: Mon., 22 July 1996 From: Camela Bryan Subject: "Sweet Mystery of Life" new story AUTHORS NOTE: This script is intended to contain one of the sub-plots in a Babylon 5 episode. Obligatory Disclaimers: I don't own anyone or anything in this story that you recognize from the show. Please don't sue me. Sweet Mystery of Life Scene 1 Captain Sheridan is alone in his quarters, seated at his desk. Sheridan: Computer try the ... ah ... medical information files "Minbari Reproduction" Computer: No accessible listings. Sheridan: What about literature? Try ... um ... Classical Minbari Literature, Subject: love. Computer: three hundred and fifty-two million, seven hundred and forty-six thousand, two hundred and seven listings Do you want epic poetry, lyric poetry, ancient mythology, historical novels...? Sheridan: (interrupting) Stop! Scan contents and give me anything that in any way describes the ... uh, ... (slightly uncomfortably) sexual act. Computer: no listings Sheridan: Oh I give up. The Captain leans back in his chair deep in thought. He is interrupted by the door signal. Sheridan: (distractedly) Enter. Geribaldi: (entering room) You ready to do the security code review? Sheridan: Yeah I...(Sheridan follows Geribaldis stare back toward the computer screen) G: Hey, it can wait if you are in the middle of something. S: No, I wasn't getting anywhere anyway. G: (Sitting on edge of desk) Problems? S: Yeah, problems I haven't had since I was fourteen. (Looks at Geribaldi) Michael, You've been "around" out there for awhile, do you know anything about Minbari women. G: I have enough trouble with human women. (Gets serious) No John I can't help you. I've never even heard of a Minbari getting involved with anyone outside their species. (Getting up) But I wouldn't worry, she seems pretty human to me. Scene 3 Sheridan and Lennier are working side by side at a computer control terminal. Sheridan: I have a friend who is doing some research into the ancient love literature of the various races, especially the more sexually explicit literature. For example humans have the Karma Sutra and Lady Chatterly's Lover and the Centari have, well the Centari have a lot of things. I was wondering do the Minbari have any such writings. Lennier: No, we think such things are sacred, private. S: oh S: (chuckling) A lot of kids first learned about sex from reading those books. (trying to be casual) How do Minbari youth usually learn about ....sex? Lennier (slightly annoyed) When a young man reaches the stage in his life where he needs to know ... "such things", his father, in a traditional ceremony, tells him. S: (trying to seem uninterested) Oh, what did your father tell you? Lennier: (speaking quickly; very annoyed and uncomfortable) I ... have not yet reached that stage. S: Oh ... I see. (pause) Well I was just curious. Scene 5 Captain Sheridan is standing at a newspaper printing machine Sheridan: Penthouse....the (He lowers his already low voice) "Tour of the Galaxy issue" Machine: Would you prefer the standard cover or the plain brown wrapper? Delenn approaches. S: (in a low voice) um, the "brown" please. (He quickly picks up his magazine nods to Delenn and walks off) Scene 6 Sheridan is alone in his quarters quickly leafing through a magazine with a plain brown cover. Sheridan: (annoyed) Humans, Centari, a few Narn, some aliens I can't even name, but no Minbari. Scene 8 Dining Hall Sheridan enters Dr. Franklin: Join me Sheridan: It's getting harder and harder to get food from Earth dome. Dr. Franklin: (looking at the gray blob on his fork) Yeah, I think we should look into producing our own ketchup. S: I guess you're treating more and more Narns. F: More and more are escaping to B-5. S: (slowly, thoughtfully) They are more similar to humans than many races, but I guess the Minbari are the most similar to humans, except for the Centari of course. F: Well, Centari and humans aren't as similar as you would think. We'll never have their immune systems or their digestive systems. Of course their life styles would kill most humans. S: (trying to change the subject) But what about the Minbari? F: Well, the Minbari actually have a more delicate digestive system than humans, but their respiratory system can handle S: (interrupting) Actually I was thinking more of differences in appearance. F: Well John, you know what Minbari look like. S: Yes, their heads and hands and the general shape of their bodies. F: (Suddenly realizing what Sheridan is really asking) I'm sorry John, there are some things a doctor can not reveal about his patients. The Doctor stands and picks up his tray. F: (leaning over to speak to Sheridan) Besides, wouldn't it be more fun to find out for yourself. Scene 9 Sheridan is standing outside Delenns door. Delenns voice: enter Sheridan enters and the door closes behind him. Delenn is wearing a loose robe the lighting is soft and is coming from behind her. Sheridan: You wanted to see me, Ambassador? Delenn: (slightly mischievously) Yes, I heard you were making "inquiries" about Minbari anatomy. Sheridan: (speaking quickly, slightly befuddled) When two people reach a certain stage in their relationship ... I didn't want to do anything to offend you. Break any ... um ... cultural ... um ... customs ... Minbari customs. (pausing) Well you have to admit you are, well, "one of a kind". Delenn: Before I entered underwent the transformation I too was curious about what I would become, what I would look like. I, however, had no trouble finding pictures of human females which showed ... every detail. I think you will find me very similar to a human female. (She drops her robe off her shoulders to reveal her naked body) Delenn: I am afraid I did not research the more ... intimate ... details of human courtship. As a member of the religious caste we were discouraged from inquiring into such things ... until it was necessary. Sheridan: (staring admiringly at her shapely form) Lennier informed me of that. Delenn: (coming close) So you see, I am afraid I may do something to offend you. (closing her robe) Perhaps I already have. Sheridan: I cannot imagine anything you could do to offend me. Delight me, (He embraces her) astound me, (He steps back, pulls her robe off her shoulders and looks at her again) but never offend me. (Sheridan embraces and kisses Delenn)