From s.phillips25@genie.comTue Jan  9 20:21:15 1996
Date: Tue, 9 Jan 96 03:49:00 UTC 0000
From: s.phillips25@genie.com
Reply to: b5-creative@blob.best.net
To: b5-creative@blob.best.net
Subject: "Thoughts", a poem

This is something that is not adult.  It was inspired by the Anna Trap
discussion.




     I thought of you when I died.
     John!
     We never said goodbye; we didn't say "I love you."

     And I died.

     I'm still alive.
     Strange, that.
     Darkness, silence, emptiness.
     And now....
     Now, darkness again.

     They gave me a choice.

     Me.  The walking dead.
     Dead inside without you.
     Work with them or die.
     What kind of choice is that?
     To one who's been there and back.

     But...
     I still live.
     While I live, there's hope.
     Hope that I see you again.
     Hope that you haven't forgotten
     Hope that we still love each other.

     Hope that I can do what they want of me,
     Give myself time that we didn't have
     Time to learn about them
     Time to leave them behind
     Time to live with you.

     Time to escape.

     I know they're not light
     I know they're dark
     I don't know what they want
     I do know what they need.

     They need me, us.
     They can't work in the open.
     And they're afraid.

     I can use that; I can work for them.
     I can.
     I can work for them, and hope..
     Hope for escape.

     I thought of you when I died.
     John!
     I thought of you as I was reborn.
     John!

     I will always think of you.



Sue