From: Jeffrey Merrill Gardner Subject: Walford Babylon Date: Thu, 03 Apr 1997 10:40:07 -0800 Walford Babylon --------------- Lennier staggered into the laundrette, nearly hidden under large bags of heavy Minbari robes. "I believe that what I wish is a 'service wash'" he said, exactly. "Oh, its one of you lot" exclaimed Pauline. "I do wish you'd stay'd in you own continuum--or at least went back there to do your washing. These things all take special handling." "I am deeply sorry for your inconvenience" apologized Lennier. "Oh, it's alright" said Pauline. David sat in the portacabin, head in his hands. No matter how much he drank the voices wouldn't stop. They kept telling him to go out and ask people what the want. "I don't bloody CARE what they want!" he exclaimed, to no one in particular. Then he poured another drink and thought about calling the Samaritians back. He was definitly losing his mind. The shadows in the portacabin seemed darker. Tiffany smiled winsomly at the huge Narn as G'Kar ordered another eggs and chips. "I'll bet he's a right handfull" she whispered confidingly to Bianca. Kath set the order down. "I don't know that we've got enough left for another so this will have to do you until I get a chance to run to the cash and carry." "But look how he eats!" said Bianca. "A healthy appetite's a good sign in a man" said Tiffany as she flounced over to try and engage G'Kar's attention. G'Kar steadfastly ignored her. To be continued. . . From: Jeffrey Merrill Gardner Subject: Walford Babylon Pt. II Date: Fri, 04 Apr 1997 06:26:20 -0800 Garibaldi sat at the bar in the Queen Vic. "Hey, you" he called to Grant, "Gimme an orange juice". Grant got the juice. Then, very deliberately, he dumped it in Garibaldi's lap. "Oh sorry" Grant said with mock contrition. Garibaldi lunged forward, grabbed Grant by the shirt and pulled him across the bar. "Look, I don't know what your problem is, buddy". "YOU'RE my problem" Grant responded. "You and all your little freak friends." "We're not exactly here voluntarily" Garibaldi replied through gritted teeth, "and until we figure out how to get home you have to put up with us". Garibaldi pushed Grant away, sending him smashing into the wall. "Boys, boys!" shrieked Peggy, tottering across the room. "If you can't behave I'll throw you BOTH out". "Sorry, mum" said Grant, rubbing his shoulder. "I'll just be going now" said Garibaldi. Grant glares at Garibaldi's retreating back until the door closes behind him. "I don't know what gets into you" Peggy exclaimed. "These people or whatever they are have as much right to drink in the Vic as anybody. And that nice Mr. Londo is such a sweetheart." "Look mum, I think you're seeing too much of him. It doesn't look right." "Oh, jealous are we!" sneered Peggy. "Well, its my pub and I'll do as I please here and thank you to mind your own business and not be assaulting the customers. "Yes, mum" replied Grant, humbly. To be continued... From: Jeffrey Merrill Gardner Subject: Walford Babylon III Date: Sat, 05 Apr 1997 11:02:17 -0800 Michelle dashed around the kitchen, trying to get ready for work. "Vicky, it's time for school." Delenn stood, uncertain, near the doorway. "Perhaps we should talk at a better time" she inquired. Michelle paused in her mad dash. "Delenn, I'm trying to understand, really, but everything you're telling me is so unbelievable!" "If we could talk more after your work?" Delenn suggested. "At the 'Vic?" "That'd be good" Michelle replied looking dazed and distracted. "Come on, Vicky, sweetheart" she said as Vicky finally appeared with her schoolbag. Delenn, Michelle and Vicky leave. In the market, Marcus Cole is minding Mark's fruit and vegetable stall. Between customers he idly fiddles with his collapsable pike. Steve wanders up and mines some fake kung-fu moves at Marcus. Marcus responds by weaving a pattern of rapid spinning jabs around Steve. "Whew!" Steve exclaims, obviously rattled. "You've got to teach me how to use that thing." Marcus replies with a smile "It's not easy". Steve buys some tomatos, still a bit shaken. "I hope you never have it in for me, man" he says in parting. Mark sat in the waiting area at the counseling center. His therapist comes out, they shake hands and go into his room. "So, how have things been" the counselor asks, smiling. "Ever since those new people moved into the square things have been different, you know what I mean?" Mark began tentatively. "Yes Mark, I read about them in 'The Sun'. How does having them around make you feel?" Mark thought a second. "It seems unsettling sometimes but they're really just people, like the rest of us." Back at the market Arthur is droning on and on about the flowering wilderness project to a laundry-laden Lennier. After an interminable length of time Arthur finishes and Lennier moves on. "I really like that boy" Arthur says meditatively to his broom and dust bin. From: Jeffrey Merrill Gardner Subject: Walford Babylon 4 Date: Fri, 25 Apr 1997 19:39:40 -0700 Walford Babylon 4 David staggered into the Chippy, looking as though he hadn't slept (or shaved) in days. Peering blearily at Ian he croaked "What do you want?" Ian, naturally confused, responds with "wait a minute, mate, what do _you_ want? Chips?" "No, no" David mutters, "what do you want, tell me what you really, really want?" "What I really, really want?" Ian repeats, irritated. Suddenly a Spice Girls song comes on in the background. David winces and limps out into the street, leaving the shop considerably brighter for his absense. Outside, he passes Delinn who jerks aside, rapidly covering her forehead with her hand. Gita, nearby with Shamilla in the stroller, asks "are you all right?" "It's nothing" Delinn replies, "just a passing Shadow". Meanwhile, a soul hunter strides out into the warm California sunshine, 39 new souls safely tucked into his collection pouch. He stops and sniffs the air. "Minbari? In this backwater continuum?" He turns and starts walking toward the primitive human 'airport'. His 39 new souls buzz happily, well, at least 38 of them do. One seems very put out by no longer being in charge. Dennis awoke with a start (if you could call it awakening) to the nearby sound of that miserable git droning on about "Luciferians". Ever since that day at the canal when that huge ugly bastard had fished him out and held a ball to his head Den had not been too happy. To begin with, there weren't any women around. Now there were women around but he didn't have a body. And even if he had a body they certainly weren't interested. To top it all off, they all thought the huge ugly bastard was the best thing since powdered milk. "AAAAGH, SHUT UP!" Den screamed, mentally. TO BE CONTINUED... From: Jeffrey Merrill Gardner Subject: Walford Babylon X Date: Mon, 28 Apr 1997 21:57:28 -0700 The soul hunter settles into his far too narrow airline seat, ignored by everyone. At the airport a dark hired man in a long trench coat runs up to the desk, panting. "Special Agent Mulder" he gasps, flashing a badge. "I have to get on that plane". "I'm sorry Agent Mulder, they're already in the air" the clerk replies cheerfully. In the Vic Londo has had far too many creme de menths and is flirting with Peggy while Grant glares on menacingly from behind the bar. Sanjay strolls up. "Going to be joining us tonight for the game at the cafe?" he asks. "Ah, yes, my fine friend", Londo replies jovially. "Perhaps I shall let you win a little something, eh?" Sanjay winces. Michelle and Delenn sit at a table nearby. Michelle looks very puzzled. "Now, human and Minbari souls do _what_?" she asks. Delenn explains patiently. "But what does this have to do with Vicky?" Michelle asks, confused. Steve, meanwhile is talking to Lennier about women. Lennier nods frequently and looks attentive. Steve talks on. And on. Meanwhile, back at the airport Agent Mulder is talking into his cellphone. "Look Scully, I don't care if it's outside our jurisdiction, I'm going after him!" He hangs up and strides down the concourse. In the laundrette the next day, Mulder is talking to Carol Jackson, who's hard at work. "I'm wondering if you've seen anything unusual around here lately?" "Unusual!" Carol scoffs. "This is Walford, nothing unusual ever happens here" she says as she transfers Minbari robes into the dryer, carefully selecting the gentle cycle. "Perhaps you need to ask over at the Vic" she suggests. Tiffany is working at the bar, still trying to flirt with G'Kar, who seems oblivious to her efforts. "Tiffany, we've got other customers, you know" Peggy scolds. Marcus Cole and Arthur are drinking together and exchanging terrible limmericks. Mulder enters, walks up to the bar, sees G'Kar stops dead and exclaims "What the hell is that?!" "That's a customer, you got some sort of problem with it?" Grant replies. "No, no" Mulder stutters "uh, where's he from?" "Some place called Narn. I think it's in Alaska somewhere, now do you want a drink or not, mate?" Grant Growls. Mulder gets a pint and sits down. To Be Continued... From: Jeffrey Merrill Gardner Subject: Walford Babylon Date: Sat, 03 May 1997 20:17:42 -0700 Walford Babylon X-Who? Lennier was finally able to get a word in edgewise and explain to Steve that his carnal knowledge was severely limited due to his being a monk. "Oh, I couldn't help but overhear" said a huge curley haired bloke with an incredibly long striped scarf. He'd been sitting around, quietly nursing a ginger-beer, all evening. "I was a monk, before I became an actor -- or was it president of Gallifrey? No matter, have a jelly baby?" He profers a packet of sweets. Lennier looks appalled. "A jelly....baby?" He askes weakly. "They're candy" interposes Steve. "There's no baby in them." "Oh...thank you" says Lennier, taking one carefully and eyeing it suspiciously for a moment before consuming it. "Quite good". Mulder sat in the corner, slack jawed, his beer going flat in front of him. Over at Michelle's Delenn is preparing to examine Vicky. "Your're sure this won't hurt her?" Michelle asks anxiously. "Quite sure" Delenn responds with a reassuring smile. "If Vicky is the previous incarnation of Valen she is in great danger. "Come here, darling, Delenn wants to talk to you", Michelle calls out. In the 'Vic Peggy approaches Mulder's table. "Hey, are you going to drink that or keep it as a souvenir?" she inquires. "Oh, sorry, I'm just surprised to see....to see...." "Oh you'll get used to it deary, I'm sure that coming from the states and all Walford must seem pretty alien to you!" "Alien's not the word for it" Mulder mutters as he watches Lennier and The Doctor talking about monasteries. "She's not Valen" Delenn announces after Vicky has gone off to play. "You said that you know that it's someone close to me" Michelle insists. "Who was Vicky's father?" Delenn asks. "But he's dead". "How did he die?" Delenn persists. Michelle makes coffee and tells her of that day at the canal. The soul hunter strides into the 'Vic. Mulder leaps to his feet pulling his gun. "Hold it right there!" he exclaims. Peggy shrieks. Lennier jumps up. "What the hell's going on? yells Grant. "You've stolen evidence from a crime scene and I'm taking you into custody!" Mulder announces. "Leave me alone human, it's not your concern" the soul hunter intones. Mulder holds his gun steady, circling around the tables to get closer. Suddenly Tiffany comes in from the back and screams. Mulder's attention is momentarily distracted and the soul hunter lunges for him. The gun goes off. Michelle and Delenn hear the shot. They both dash out of the kitchen and run for the 'Vic. The soul hunter is lying on the floor. Lennier has lept upon him and is scrabbling for the collecton pouch. Mulder tries to wrestle it away from him. "No!" Lennier exlcaims. "These are the souls he has taken." As Mulder struggles with Lennier for the pouch he doesn't see Marcus Cole creeping up behind him. Mulder crumples to the floor. Lennier, clutching the bag, rushes out into the street, nearly knocking down Michelle and Delenn. "What happened?" Michelle asks. "Soul Hunter" gasps Lennier. "Here", he passes the bag to Delenn. She turns and hurries back to Michelle's house. "I'll watch Vicky for you" see calls over her shoulder. By the time the ambulance arrives both Mulder and the Soul Hunter are coming to. The Soul Hunter, bleeding slightly from a shoulder wound, is taken away ranting about his lost souls. The ambulance attendants are heard discussing the necessity of a psychiatric evaluation as they drive off. Mulder refuses medical attention and glares around the room, wondering who his attacker was. Marcus looks slightly sheepish. In the square, people stand about, all talking at once. Mulder is speaking to one of the remaining bobbies. Vicky watches wide-eyed as Delenn frees the souls one by one. 38 souls fly off happily. The 39th is still a bit grumpy. At the first mental contact with the 40th soul Delenn freezes, startled. "Valen!" she exclaims. Den is thoroughly confused by now. "Dennis Watts" he enunciates as clearly as his disembodied form will allow, "Not Valen". "No, not Valen now, but you will be" Delenn answers as he speeds off into the night. Michelle comes in and looks questioningly at Delenn and Vicky. "It is over, Valen is safe" Delenn says. Out in the square The Doctor is talking with Lennier while Garibaldi, Londo and the others listen intently. "So you and the others were examining this artifact just before you found yourselves here?" "Yes" Lennier responded. "The artifact had been recovered by our commander from the planet of the Great Machine. We were gathered around it, speculating about its function, when there was a blinding flash and we found ourselves here." "Dear me, dear me, that must have been most distressing for you" The Doctor replies sympathetically. "What was this Great Machine you referred to, by the way?" "We don't really know" Lennier muses. "It is a huge underground machine of unknown but extremely advanced technology. Maybe some sort of planetary defense system. Some of the power generators we found were 10 MILES across. It occupies an underground portion of Euphrates, in the Epsilon 3 system". "My, my, ten miles did you say? And Epsilon 3... Epsilon 3..." The Doctor replies distractedly. "Why does that sound so familiar?". The Doctor thinks for a moment. "Of course!" he mutters, "but that's ancient history...we shut it down after the Great War.... I knew we never should have left them..." "What did you say", asks Lennier, "I didn't quite hear you." "And what was that about a Great War?" Londo asks from the other side. "That means you are...Oh, my, oh my I've got to get you all back." The Doctor continues muttering. "Listen buddy", Garibaldi breaks in impatiently. "What the hell are you talking about? We've been stuck in this backwater hole with no way to get home and we don't need some absent minded nut ball wasting our time, so..." "Yes, yes, yes" The Doctor cuts him off. "I do understand, and I'm so sorry I was unclear. It's just that one's memory does dull a bit after a few million years, and well, yes, in short I must return you to your rightful place in the space time comtinuum." Garibaldi's angry look turns to shocked surprise, then joy. "Well it's about time!" he exclaims. "This is happy news indeed" says G'Kar. "I have so missed Narn opera." "Yes, and I am sure Vir will be happy to see me" Londo says. "I wonder what disastrous messes I will have to rescue him from when I get back." Delenn has returned to the square and finds her way to Lennier's side. "What is happening?" she asks. Lennier turns to her and replies "This fellow says he is going to return us to Babylon 5". "But how, and who are you?" asks Delenn. "All will be explained as we travel" The Doctor replies brightly. "But now, if you will all accompany me to my Tardis, we'll be off!" "What's a Tardis?" Garibaldi asks, somewhat dazed. "Over here" The Doctor says, leading them to a call box that has somehow appeared in the middle of the square. "This is my ship, and my home, from which all of space and time is open to me". "You mean this is some sort of time machine?" asks Garibaldi, now more alert. "Much more than that, my dear fellow" replies The Doctor. "We've greatly improved the technology since your little war." "What's this war you keep mentioning?" interjects Londo, pointedly. "Never mind, never mind" says The doctor briskly. "That's for another day. Right now we have to get you home. Now in you go!" The Doctor opens the Tardis and ushers them all inside. Mulder finishes talking with the Bobby and looks up to see a bright flash of rainbow corruscations warp and twist strangely around the old phone booth before it vanishes. He stumbles back dizzily and bumps into Grant. "Hey mate, Grant growls, "watch where you're going." "Did you see it?" Mulder asks excitedly. "That call box just vanished into thin air!" "You've had a few too many, mate" Grant replies curtly. "We haven't had a call box on this street for years." Grant walks back into the "Vic, leaving Mulder alone in the street looking very confused. THE END